Hot Playwrights XIII

I say hot double damn! Hot. Double. Damn.

That hair!

That body!

You know:
I do imagine that Sammy B. and me would have totally totally hung out. We'd sit on a porch. In silence. He'd slightly indicate that we smoke cigarettes. I'd slightly nod in agreement. We'd light up. And smoke cigarettes.

And then: some elderly person would slowly walk by.

And then stop walking. And with a scrunched up face, he would slowly turn towards Sammy B. and me. And then he'd shake his head in absolute disgust. He'd then begin to slowly walk down the street. And while still in hearing distance, Sammy B. and me would burst out laughing. The old would stop walking. Turn around. And then shake his head at us again. At this point, Sammy B. is trying to suppress laughter. But me: I'm crying from laughter. Which causes Sammy B. to break out into laughter again. The old turns around. Slowly walks down the street, all the while shaking his head.

Our laughter has come to a quell. We wipe the remaining tears from our faces. We light up another cigarette. And smoke. In silence.

If only.

(Yeah, so, this picture was doctored up on this site Literary Makeovers!!!. But I can imagine it's accurate. I mean, the man excelled at cricket. And we all know that cricket players are fit. We ALL know this).

Hot Playwrights - XII

Katori Hall. A mountaintop of hot.

Hot Playwrights XI: Young Jean Lee

We begin every Youngblood meeting with "What have you seen?" This is a chance for the members to discuss the plays they've seen since the last meeting, what they liked or didn't like about them, and so forth. This often leads to big philosophical discussions about theater. Other times it doesn't.

Young Jean Lee's Lear was one of those other times. We talked about the play for five seconds and then somebody mentioned that Young Jean has the perfect hair. We then discussed the wonders of Young Jean's hair for about fifteen minutes. Because we're a sophisticated lot.

Her hair is pretty great:



I was lucky to attend the closing night of We're Gonna Die, Young Jean's offering to 13P, and I drunkenly recalled the conversation to the playwright herself. She wasn't surprised. I guess she gets that a lot?

Young Jean's got swagger.

By the way, if you missed the show, the whole thing is streaming for free. Yay, internet!

Hot Playwrights X: Rajiv Joseph

Welcome to the tenth edition of Hot Playwrights, our important initiative that celebrates any and all playwrights who don't resemble Susan Boyle or Comic Bookstore Guy from The Simpsons. This is just one of the many ways we keep it klassy here on The Youngblog.

A female Youngblooder who shall remain nameless asked me to post Rajiv Joseph and after I saw the picture she attached I couldn't disagree. Behold:



Oh snap! Look how hot he is. See his smoldering good looks? I like to think Rajiv is the sensitive, intense type of dude who writes poetry for his conquests and makes them eggs in just his boxers. He also looks like he might be super serious, like he'd admonish you for watching Millionaire Matchmaker or reading the tabloids. But maybe not. This next picture seems to say, "I'm smart and sexy but I also have a sense of humor about myself." Ready? Here it is:


Swoon! Wikipedia says Rajiv is from Cleveland, but in my imagination he's English. Just because. Anyway, Rajiv was nominated for a Pulitzer last year. Well, the girls and gays of Youngblood are giving him our prize for Playwright We'd Most Like to See Shirtless. Well played, Rajiv.

P.S. If you do a Google image search for "shirtless Rajiv Joseph" you'll be disappointed. Internet, please fix this grievous oversight forthwith.

Hot Playwrights IX: Tommy Smith

In my ongoing quest to prove that not all playwrights are hatchet faces, I humbly submit the handsome, handsome grill of Tommy Smith.





Look at this guy. Look at his blond hair. Look at his smoldering gaze. There's no doubt he's gorgeous. He seems kind of aloof though, doesn't he? He kind of seems like the kind of guy that girls fawn all over and the more he ignores them the more they like him, you know? Like Jordan Catalano from My So-Called Life... but with the ability to read!

I don't know Tommy but we share the same hometown; Seattle, where cute boys are bred before they move to Brooklyn. Also, I once saw him in a production of Spinning Into Butter at The Intiman. He was really good!

Also, in an alternate (and wonderful) universe where cute boys are queer as a two dollar bill, I bet Tommy would dress like Brad Goreski. Which, OMG, would be amazing.


My transformation into a 12-year-old girl is now complete and I bid you adieu.

Hot Playwrights VIII

Lucy Prebble. Enron might still be open if she were on the poster...

Hot Playwrights VII

Ashlin Halfnight, hockey hunk turned playwright edition:


"Dude, coach says if I don't get an A in Anatomy he won't let me play in the big game this weekend. You gotta help me! I'll do anything for a passing grade."

Hot Playwrights VI

Sam Shepard. Not even fair.

Hot Playwrights V

Let's discuss Harold Pinter.

I stole this Cecil Beaton photograph (another, not too shabby), just flat stole it like this is the Internet or something, from a New Yorker profile written by John Lahr a few years back. It's an incredibly foxy photograph and it accompanies a really great profile that you should definitely print out and take with you on your July 4th Holiday Vacation, or your Canada Day Holiday Vacation, or Whatever, because how better to celebrate a long weekend than to read about a dude who used his Nobel lecture to drop the following science:

You have to hand it to America. It has exercised a quite clinical manipulation of power worldwide while masquerading as a force for universal good. It's a brilliant, even witty, highly successful act of hypnosis.

Then he quoted Neruda! Grrrrrrowl. I think I need a glass of water.

Hot Playwrights IV: Annie Baker Edition.

Real talk express: Annie is a Youngblood alum, so hopefully it's not too uncouth to post this. Let me just state the obvious right up front: straight dudes in theater LOVE Annie Baker. Like, a lot. I don't know Annie personally, but she looks just like this girl named Brenna who sat next to me in A.P. English.

Arty dudes loved Brenna too. She dated Gabe who was one of the hottest arty, rocker boys in school. She was soft and kind of quiet, which belied a ferocious intelligence. Because she was so smart she was hard to get close too, which undoubtedly drove boys crazy. Few people got to know how hilarious she was. Most of those boys didn't know that Brenna had better taste in music and books than they did either. But she did. Brenna went on to become the valedictorian and Gabe went on to... well, who knows? He was never really good enough for her anyway.

I'm into dudes, but even I can admit that Annie is hot. Look how pretty her hair is! Also, she's always wearing cute stuff in press photos. I mean, it probably doesn't hurt her cute quotient that she's really talented or whatever. I guess she's written a couple of plays that people kind of liked or something? But who cares about dumb old plays? Something tells me that Annie, like Brenna, makes incredible mixed tapes. I wonder if she was ever into Sonic Youth.

At any rate, I'm certain- CERTAIN- that there must be heart broken arty boys all over New York because of Annie and to them I dedicate Jackson Browne's "Somebody's Baby."



Keep dreaming, boys!

Hot Playwrights III

I'm just going to go ahead and say it.

You can't talk about hot playwrights without singing the praises of Sheila Callaghan.

We all follow her on twitter, but let's be honest...we'd follow her anywhere. You make us CRUMBLE, Sheila! CRUMBLE.

Hot Playwrights II

Obviously Will is an amazing writer. But I also think playwright Will Eno is sexy, even though I once got rejected from a workshop he was teaching. (Don't reject me... I hold grudges!)

He's sexy in a serious, introverted kind of way, like that kid in high school who read Nietzsche and always hung out in the art room. The kind of guy who grows up to be a hot Park Slope dad (which is how he looks in this photo.)

It's hot, but it can also go too far. I'll bet he'd want to go shopping for used books at The Strand on a first date, which is cool, but then he'd spend the whole time "teaching" you about his favorite books and making you feel lame for not being as well read as him. Plus, I'd worry that he wouldn't laugh when you tell a funny joke.

You're not so cool, Will Eno! What a jerk! WE'RE BREAKING UP. Wait, what? Sorry. I'm sorry.

Anyway, Will Eno is brilliant and pretty.

Hot Playwrights

I was at an event for playwrights last year (it wouldn't be nice of me to say which one) when I had a realization: in general, we're kind of fugly. I looked around at these pasty, pudding people with their bad skin and jacked up outfits and thought, "I might as well be at a Dungeons & Dragons convention."

I know I'm generalizing in a way that's not very nice. I'm doing it on purpose because it's fun. I've written about it elsewhere, but Martin McDonagh is a massive exception to the uggo rule. Check it out:

Oh snap! He's one hot silver fox. Can't you just picture smoking a cigarette with him in bed? I don't even smoke!

I can only think of one playwright who I think is hotter, but I actually know him so I won't post his name here. What do you think? Who are the hip, stylish, sexy, cool playwrights?